we are having another sweet GIRL! Sweet Audrey Grace will be arriving somewhere around the end of September.
Now...I don't usually get this "real" on the blog....usually it's just sunshine and roses and rainbows around here as I tell you about sweet Emily and how great our life is. But I have a tiny confession- I have been a nervous wreck about this baby for literally months now. Like, scared to death that today was going to come and we would find out he/she had some horrific birth defect, or a huge disability, or SVT like Stellan, etc. etc. etc. It's been so bad that I haven't *really* let myself "bond" with the baby a lot because I was sort of convinced that today would come, we would get some awful diagnosis, and we would have to make a lot of really hard, terrible choices.
So let me say what a HUGE relief it is to know that she is A-OK! The cervix is looking great- over 3.5cm right now which my doc said was "totally sweet" (lol LOVE her!) Audrey was sitting straight up and down in the uterus SOUND ASLEEP on the placenta...it was so funny! It looked like she had been watching TV or something and nodded off the way she was leaned up against it. She said my cord is nice and high and nowhere near the cervix. She did say Audrey is sitting squarely on top of my bladder which made me feel better about these trips I'm having to let out a cough medicine cup full of pee! She weighs 12oz.
The tech was having a super hard time with the sex b/c she was sitting down in there. FINALLY she got to a position where we could sort of see and I saw 3 little lines flash SUPER fast and blurted out- "It's a girl!" Paul looked at the u/s tech and she had a little smile on her face....she was like, "I am trying so hard to get you a clear picture of this..." and then she got it again and said, "Yep, Mommy, you are right- she is all girl!" I was so excited (this was towards the end of the u/s when we had seen all her other organs and everything looked good) I was almost shaking b/c it was too good to be true- she is perfect and healthy and CALM (for now...we'll see if Emily doesn't rub off on her).
I feel 1 million percent better about this pregnancy than I did before. It's like I needed everything to be OK today to "let" me let myself get excited, if that makes sense. Paul and I went to brunch after and I just gushed out, "She's our little Audrey, and I already love her!" He looked at me like he was surprised I was just feeling this way but I have seriously had a little secret wall up against this because I was convinced something was going to go wrong. So far, so good though. I loved Emily right from the very second she was "discovered" but I feel like now I am a lot less naive about pregnancy than I was before. At any rate, I am rambling like a loon now so I'm going to stop. We are so excited to have our precious 2 girls!!
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